Forced Marriages for Men May Lead to Male-Refuge in UK
When Imran Rehman was 10 years old, he was taken to Pakistan to attend a lavish and massive family party. He was seated next to a little girl in a pretty dress and they both had garlands placed around their necks, he was unaware it was in fact his own engagement party to his cousin.
Five years later he was shown photographs of the celebration and told its significance.
“It made me feel sick, knowing that was my engagement. I went off the rails. I got into the wrong crowd, I got into fights, and I got expelled from two schools” he said.
His parents decided it was time to send him back to Pakistan and regain ‘control’ of him with the help of family members.
They ‘tricked’ him into believing he was going for a holiday, telling him that they were taking him to see the area where they had been born. Once in Pakistan they drugged him and took him to a mosque in a deserted village where he was imprisoned for 15 days with shackles locked around his feet.
Because of Imran and many others being forced into marriage, the UK’s first male-only refuge is now being considered by the Government to help them overcome the dramatic effect the experience has had on their lives.
Women and Forced Marriages
Society is well aware of young girls being forced into marriages but this story now brings to the forefront the plight of men too.
Women for hundreds of years have been married to men who have abused and ruled their complete lives. Suicide has sometimes been the only escape for some desperate women, or we hear ‘stories’ of them being killed off as they no longer serve their purpose.
In Bradford alone, 300 girls are missing. Thought to be victims of forced marriages where many school aged girls just disappear, or simply do not return after a family holiday abroad.
Arranged and Forced Marriages
Arranged marriages are where both families play an active role in coordinating the marriage but the intended bride and groom still have the final choice of acceptance.
Whereas a forced marriage is where at least one party does not consent to the marriage and most cases involve young women aged between 13 and 30 years. Evidence is now showing that 15 per cent of victims are male.
Huma Awan of the Incompatible Marriages Project, which has dealt with 300 cases of forced marriages in the past three years, has put the figure even higher for males at 40%.
"This was a real eye-opener for me as it is usually seen as a very female issue," she said.
"A lot of men think it is not an issue they can go and seek advice on, but it is a very hard subject for both sexes to address."
"Forced marriage is prevalent among the very young. They are easier to coerce, as opposed to those who are more educated," Ms Awan said.
New Law to Protect Victims
In July 2007 legislation was aimed at protecting the victims of forced marriages and courts will be able to make orders to help potential victims under the Forces Marriage (Civil Protection) Act. The Bill was introduced last November to Parliament by Lord Lester of Herne Hill and the Government strengthened the draft legislation and laid amendments to the Bill providing great powers to the courts to identify and protect those being forced into marriages.
Furthermore, courts will be able to attach powers of arrest to orders so that if someone breaches an order they can be arrested and brought back to the original court to consider the alleged breach.
This is good news for those that are strong and brave enough to come forward to report such forced marriages, but there are many who fear for their lives and their family, beaten into submission and living with threats over their heads – these are the one’s who are too afraid to speak out!
